Cow Bay

I’m late again with this thing. Weeks pass like angry pedestrians around here. NEW THINGS:

Got back from Cow Bay a few days ago. Funny story, I thought the name was something exotic like “Cao Bay” or some junk like that. But no, it is “Cow Bay” - named for the cattle that used to roam there, I hear. Either way, I kept a log during my time that I spent there. Here it is:

Day 1:

We drove up from Cairns to Cow Bay today - roughly a two-hour trip, but the time flies by as fast as the beautiful scenery. Cow Bay is named so for the cleared pastures that used to host cattle (I saw one grazing on the way here). Apparently, for that reason, much of the rain forrest you first see is not actually pristine. You wouldn’t guess just by looking.

So far we’re not so much farmers as we are builders. George is in the midst of raising a shed/guesthouse for a more comfortable living environment during visits to the property, with ambitious plans to build a finished house several meters away. We got a few sheets of metal up on the roof after some touchup for hasty work already done by a neighbor. Tomorrow we’ll attempt to finish the roof and get rid of the tarp currently protecting it from the elements. I worked up a few good sweats, but am egging George on to put me to some real use tomorrow.

The day after we plan to begin tending to the vines. I look forward to it with great anticipation. I also hope to gather source images for the website. I have so many ideas that they’re pouring out of my head, and I need to get them down before I forget. If only to test that they’re actually viable.

I’m in a cozy tent, aka “my room”, on the deck of the current open-air shelter we use as a dining room/lounge/kitchen. The bugs are trapped safely on the outside and I intend to keep it that way. Not only do I have to remember to protect myself from the sun, but insect repellent is now a must as well.

The Daintree is exactly how you might expect tropical Australia to look and feel. Why don’t you come on up sometime?

Day 2:

Finished putting the roof irons up on the new shed. George says tomorrow we’ll knock out some of the temporary timbers and give it a rest for a few days. By “rest” I mean we’ll begin the busy work of tending to the vines. He asked me “Aye mate. You any good with a shovel?” That can’t bode well.

I ate a seriously crazy portion of dinner tonight. Putting a roof on a shed is about as easy as it sounds.

Day 3:

Screwed down some of the roofing iron we tacked on earlier, then attempted to install a gutter but the metal we have is very old and warped so it doesn’t channel water so much as collect and drain it wherever. George says we’ll work to correct it in a couple days. In any case it’s a temporary solution until we can get the official gutter thrown in there. It’s sitting on the ground right now, but it’s spankin’ new.

George busted out some divining rods randomly and had me detect an underground water source below us. Near as I can figure, there’s something to these rods. You wouldn’t believe it by hearing or even seeing. But once you hold them you can’t stop them from moving in a repeatable motion. Strange but apparently true.

Tomorrow the plan is to install a new trellis and move some vines to it. I’m promised a full day of back-breaking labor. I say bring it on. Additionally, work on the website is in full swing and the mother is coming right along. You’ll see.

Day 4:

This morning we headed to a local store to get some supplies and managed to see a cassowary along the way. This is quite a strange animal. It looks like a mix between a turkey, an ostrich, a dog, and a dinosaur. The one we saw was only meandering across the gravel road. When we approached it slowly, it wandered away into the bush. Unfortunately, I didn’t have my camera on me, so I couldn’t snap any photos.

Anyway, we finally got to do some farm stuff! We repaired a fallen trellis and I got good and messy in the process. Later we altered the gutters on the shed so far so that they actually functioned as such. Some of Josette and George’s friends came over and we all had lunch. Strange thing though, we were eating chicken sandwiches and I, having just bought some potato chips from the shop, decided I’d go get some. As soon as I broke them out, one of the women went slack-jawed and wide-eyed at me. I mean full-on aghast. I froze for a few moments and asked her, literally, “What’s up?” Apparently eating pre-packaged potato chips with sandwiches is completely unheard of here. They informed me that chips - aka fries - are perfectly fine, but somewhere along the lines, eating American chips with a sandwich is some kind of faux pas. Whatever though. I pooped on their modest sensibilities and slamma-jamma’d them into my face hole along with a pile of sandwich. Take that!

All kidding aside though, poop.

In other news, eventually you learn to live with the fact that your ankles are perpetually itchy no matter how much bug spray you put on. Similarly, you stop caring about green ants crawling all over you, as they’re effing everywhere. They eat fly grubs which helps the plants out, so they’re technically employed.

We put together a port-o-toilet this evening (Have you ever watched three grown adults trying to figure out something as simple as shitting into a plastic bowl? It is a sight to behold!) and I punished it to an extent that would make Uncle Sam blush. Dinner consisted ironically of sausages. A couple regular bandicoots came out to feed on scraps we gave them. They’re very trusting animals. They’ll scrounge for food in the middle of our area as we walk and work around them. It seems like there’s a family of three that visits us. We just saw a large male for the first time, and assumed maybe he’s with the mother and baby who have visited the past few nights.

There’s a lot more I should describe, but I’m freaking tired as a panther and need to start writing down notes of what I should mention. I’M NOT HERE TO IMPRESS YOU.

Night.

Day 5:

I’m cheating a little on this one, writing it the morning after since I forgot last night.

Yesterday was a bit of a lazy day in that George built a bush shower with some sparse help from myself. I, in the meantime, fashioned a hammock from scratch out of some fishing net, rope, and a few planks of wood. Turned out pretty well. A little narrow and long and the only place it will fit near the shelter is out in the sun, but it holds my body above the ground. The damn thing’s pretty much fall proof as well.

I’d like to mention some quick things which have nothing to do with anything, but I think I need to be heard:

1: George and Josette are crazy about bones. Not like, archeological or small animal bones or anything. I mean that when they cook a fish or a chicken or something, they go straight for the bones and suck all the meat they can from them, which is good and all, I suppose. Waste not want not. But it’s like a culture to them. On the plus side that leaves more big chunks of meat for me so I shouldn’t complain.

2: There’s a radio commercial that comes on all the time here for a restaurant called “Cork and Bull”, but it sounds like the announcer is saying “Cock and Ball”. He says it like fifty times in one minute too, really excited. I’m pretty sure they say the words “cock” and “ball” similarly to Americans. I’m don’t know how they make out the difference.

3: My fingernails are ALWAYS dirty - even when it’s impossible. Last effing night I sat here and meticulously cleaned them all with my nail clippers. They weren’t sparkling clean but they didn’t have any big chunks of dirt in them. I JUST woke up and the only thing I’ve done between now in then is go to the bathroom a few times. I never touched anything but my tent, my bed, and my wang the whole time. But guess what! My fingernails are filthy once more!

4: I had a dream last night about having a huge, thick beard. There was a Nintendo anthology and some pornography as well, but the beard stood out.

Now that that’s finished, I just remembered I also cleared the area right in front of our shelter and zenned it out as best I could. We got a ton of rain last night and the mozzies are everywhere, and taking no prisoners. There’s talk outside my tent of packing up and heading back early. We’re only halfway through our planned stay, but the rain has everyone anxious and there’s a cyclone lurking to the west that may make it to us. Either way I’m fine. I know my email is piling up somewhere, but I’m also fine staying another fine days and kicking my ass with labor. We shall see.

Day 6:

I’m writing this a bit early (only 5:30), since my battery’s running low and the portable cells we brought with us are being crazy and not charging it.

Not too much to report anyway. We moved two vines back to the trellis we fixed to make way for a septic tank which will eventually be installed. Then a shit ton of rain came down. It rained like a bastard last night too. Now the entire property is saturated and it’s pissing down even still. I just got done having a cold shower and we’ve confirmed that we’ll be heading back down to Cairns tomorrow evening. It’ll only be a few days early.

Too bad I won’t get much time to work on my last night here.

End log. Day 7 was spent hastily tacking on the roof before we left at about 4pm. When we got back, I took a nice, warm shower and probably slept. I can’t remember. Since then I’ve been working on the website and hanging out. Been out a couple times with Greg. And I’ve taken a step toward getting ready for the fishing season. Yesterday I took a required CPR course. Up next is an oxygen providers cert and the fabled dingy driver’s license. Oh! And I rode a jet ski for the first time yesterday! One that went 110 km/hr! Booyah! I can’t believe someone let me drive that thing. I want to buy one.

Lates.